Whose Approval Are We Seeking? Part 2 Acceptance

There I stood, miles from my comfort zone, vying for a spot on the varsity cheerleading squad. This was my first attempt at cheering, and I can honestly say, I would have rather been having a root canal.  The once familiar gym floor felt like foreign soil; anxiety kicked in, as my feet kicked up.

Short of breath, it was as if the oxygen had been zapped from the room.  Surely this lack of oxygen contributed to my forgetting most of the routine I was struggling through.  I don’t know why I waited until high school to do this; obviously the other girls had been cheering since the womb.  Still, I was determined to try, even though deep in my heart, I knew.

You can probably guess how this all turned out; for years after I felt like a failure.  I failed to gain acceptance to the group who wore matching uniforms on pep-rally days.  Then it all came to light.  You see, I was never meant to be a cheerleader;  back-flips terrified me, and my perfect cartwheel wouldn’t get me far on the cheering circuit.  I do however, have mad twirling skills, so why didn’t I tryout for majorette?  Looking back, I wish I had; it would have been a much better fit for my gifts, talents, and abilities.

Feeling out of the loop, and not part of the group is disheartening.  Ever been there?  Well this should hearten you:  through faith in Christ, we never have to feel that way again.  We become members of one body; unified.

We are each a unique, one-of-a-kind creation by our Creator. God has given each of us gifts, talents, and abilities all our own, so why try to make up our own version of who we are?

I am most free, when I am who God created me to be. When I try to be someone I’m not, it’s like using the wrong key to unlock a door. What happens? The door stays locked, and I’ve created a barrier between my plans and God’s plans for me.

Just as cheerleaders put on uniforms  of solidarity and unification; believers put on Christ, we put on a brand-new self.  We put on the Armor of God, we are a member of His army.  We are His chosen, putting on many beautiful virtues; above all, love, which is the perfect bond of unity.  

Here’s the truth; we all yearn to be a part of a group, to be accepted, to be a part of something bigger then ourselves.  God deposited that desire in us.  We don’t have to tryout, He says come just as you are. He accepts us, and His approval is all we need; His grace is sufficient.

Were you heartened by that truth?  Did you know the definition of hearten is: “to give heart to: cheer” Guess if you were heartened, I’m a cheerleader after all.

“So, as those who have been chosen of God, holy and beloved, put on a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience; bearing with one another, and forgiving each other, whoever has a complaint against anyone; just as the Lord forgave you, so also should you. Beyond all these things put on love, which is the perfect bond of unity.”  Colossians 3:11-14

Share an experience when you sought to be part of a group. What did you learn from it?

Whose Approval Are We Seeking?

Do you ever strive to gain approval from other people?

I know I have, and found it to be discouraging, exhausting, and disappointing.

What happens when we feel ignored, or that our opinion doesn’t matter?

I’m preaching to myself here, and taking notice of the “all about me” pattern. It’s easy to fall prey to these feelings, leaving us discouraged and a bit grumpy.

Here are a few traps. See if you can relate to some of these:

• Saying yes because a “no” might disappoint someone (aka, people-pleaser syndrome)
• Allowing the opinions of others to determine our worth and value
• Feeling like an outsider; excluded; invisible; rejected
• Desiring validation of our gifts and talents; confirmation from others that what we do matters, that our contributions make a difference.
• Trying to impress, or feeling we have to prove ourselves to gain acceptance

I can relate, can you?

Perhaps it’s a pride issue.

Pride is sticky, sneaky, and fleshy. That’s why Romans 8:1 says walk not according to the flesh, but according to the Spirit.

Could it be a lack confidence, not in ourselves, but of who we are in Christ?

Who exactly are we in Christ?

A new creation; a delivered, set free, sanctified, child of God, among other things. A woman of God, redeemed by Jesus Christ. A woman clothed with strength and honor (Prov. 31:25).

Praise God, we are changed.

So how can we be free of striving to be good enough, accepted, approved of, appointed, or chosen by people?

True acceptance is found in Christ.       

Let’s remember who we are in Christ. It’s not all about us, it’s all about what He can do through us for His glory.

We can’t allow our feelings to bring us low enough to skin our chin. The enemy would love us to believe lies that render us ineffective.

When we stop seeking approval from the crowd, and go straight to the Word of truth, we discover our true acceptance is found in Christ.

Let’s look at Scripture, and soak in this truth.  Are we ready for this?  Cause the truth will set us free:

• “Therefore, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God.”  1 Corinthians 10:31

• “For the appeal we make does not spring from error or impure motives, nor are we trying to trick you. On the contrary, we speak as those approved by God to be entrusted with the gospel.  We are not trying to please people but God, who tests our hearts.”  1 Thessalonians 2:3-4

• “Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God?  Or am I trying to please people?  If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ.”  Galatians 1:10

So how can we apply these scriptures?

Let’s ask ourselves these questions:

1. Do I believe God’s Word is true?

2. What’s my motivation (e.g.,seeking glory for my own accomplishments, or desiring to give glory to God)?

3. What’s more important to me, gaining approval from people or approval from God?

4. Am I trying to please people or God?

Remember, our hearts can be deceitful so let’s not fool ourselves. Look deeper, because we may think one way, but our actions prove otherwise. It’s nice to gain approval from others, but we shouldn’t require it.

Accept this truth: God appoints us, approves us, accepts us, and loves us unconditionally. He has plans for us, opens doors for us, and His plans cannot be thwarted. Hallelujah!

God’s approval is all we need, and when we are walking deeper in faith, righteousness, and truth, He is glorified. That’s the ultimate purpose we should be seeking.

Lord, we give you thanks and praise on this good day you have made. Help us to seek your Word for truth of our value, that we may study it and show thyself approved in Your eyes. We pray our intentions will be pure, and through You, we can break free of the bondage of seeking approval from others. Your approval is all we need. Help us to be encouragement to others who struggle in this area, that we may speak life-affirming words that glorify You. In Jesus Name. Amen.

Have you ever struggled with this issue? Share your thoughts…